Domestic Violence Advocacy

Domestic violence advocacy is a form of support based on what you need to feel safe and stable. A domestic violence advocate can help you navigate the challenges of being in a current or past abusive relationship.

Advocacy comes in many forms: It might include identifying strategies to increase your safety. Or it might involve support in navigating systems. For example, your advocate can help you apply for unemployment or Social Security income. Advocacy might include housing support, whether that’s assistance in applying to subsidized housing or help with finding an affordable apartment (JFS does not have our own shelters or transitional living programs).

Your advocate will support you based on what you identify as your next steps towards safety and stability. For more information, please see FAQ for Survivors below.

Support Groups

Support groups are facilitated by advocates. They provide a space where you can learn more about domestic violence, learn coping strategies for trauma, and connect with others who may have had similar experiences.

We offer a virtual support group bi-annually where attendees can learn more about narcissistic abuse and connect in a confidential space with other survivors of intimate partner abuse. During this 1-hour session, survivors learn about the red flags of narcissistic behaviors and manipulation tactics as well as strategies on how to detach and heal from these abusive relationships. 
 
In this session, survivors examine excerpts from the book, “Becoming the Narcissist’s Nightmare: How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself” written by Shahida Arabi.
 
If you are a survivor of intimate partner violence and are interested in attending a future support group, please click the Get Help button below and mark interest in support group.

Get Help

• Safety Tips
  • Talk with friends, family, neighbors, coworkers, rabbis or lay leaders. Let them know what’s happening and brainstorm ways they might be able to help.
  • If possible, have a phone accessible at all times and know what numbers to call for help. Know where the nearest public phone is located. Know the phone number to your local 24-hour domestic violence hotline. If your life is in danger, call the police.
  • Plan the easiest escape. Decide on a door or window to exit quickly and safely.
  • Teach your children how to get help. Instruct them not to get involved in the violence between you and your partner. Plan a code word to signal to them that they should get help or leave the house and go to a neighbor.
  • Practice how to get out safely with your children.
  • Make a habit of backing the car into the driveway and keeping it fueled. Keep the driver’s door unlocked and others locked, for a quick escape.
  • Move away from the kitchen, bathroom or any place where there are dangerous or sharp objects.
  • Try not to wear scarves or long jewelry that could be used to strangle you.
  • Create several plausible reasons for leaving the house at different times of the day or night.
  • Make a plan for times when you are at work. You may want to speak with your employer about changing work locations or hours, or alerting security or reception staff to your situation.
  • Prepare an emergency bag. Put together a bag that includes money, copies of house and car keys, medicine, and copies of important papers such as birth certificates, social security cards, immigration documents, marriage certificate, court orders, and health insurance information. The bag can also include extra clothes, important phone numbers, or other things you need if you have to leave your home in a hurry. If you prepare an emergency bag, have a place in mind where you can safely keep it such as at the home of a trusted friend or family member.
  • Tell your children that violence is never right, even when someone they love is being violent. Tell them that neither you, nor they, are at fault or are the cause of the violence, and that when anyone is being violent, it is important to stay safe.

   

  Get Help (206) 861-3159

• Am I In An Abusive Relationship?

  Does my partner…

  • Regularly criticize, shout or call me names?
  • Withhold approval or affection as a form of punishment?
  • Throw objects near or at me?
  • Humiliate me in private or public?
  • Dismiss hurtful comments as jokes?
  • Display irrational jealousy or accuse me of imagined affairs?
  • Isolate me from family and friends?
  • Control where I go?
  • Control my access to money?
  • Abandon me in strange places?
  • Ridicule or insult my most valued beliefs or religion?
  • Ridicule or insult my race, class or sexual orientation?
  • Threaten to commit suicide if I leave?
  • Threaten to hurt someone I love (i.e. family, friends, pets etc.)?
  • Hold me against my will, push me or lock me out of my house?
  • Destroy my personal belongings?
  • Punch, shove, slap, bite, kick, burn, choke, hit or force/pressure me to have sex?

   

  If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, Project DVORA is here to help.

   

  Get Help (206) 861-3159

• Jewish-Specific Resources
  • Shalom Task Force is a confidential hotline for Jewish survivors seeking culturally specific support around domestic violence. (888) 883-2323
  • Get ORA (Organization for the Resolution of Agunot) advocates for survivors of domestic abuse who are struggling to receive their get.